PW #304: Young Adult Literary Thriller: THEN BEGGARS WOULD RIDE

Manuscript Status: Finished

Mentor Name: Destiny Cole
Mentee Name: Tracie V. Martin
Title: THEN BEGGARS WOULD RIDE
Category: Young Adult
Genre: Literary Thriller

Word Count: 64,000 words

Pitch:

Everyone believes Gwen’s boyfriend is a cult leader. After disappearing without a word, he’s resurfaced as the Beggar with a goal to spread “The Message” far and wide. Not willing to lose him, Gwen hits the road to bring him home. But as she and his ragtag disciples trail in the Beggar’s wake, Gwen discovers his mission is much more sinister than just preaching. 

Told as a prison confessional, it’s THE WALLS AROUND US meets THE DEVIL AND THE BLUEBIRD.

Excerpt:

Transcript #1

First, you’re going to ask how we met. Everyone does. It’s not even the stupidest question people ask. That’s “How did you shave?” Once, I would have fucked with you, pretended that I cared if hair bloomed out of my armpits while I tracked my boyfriend from coast to coast as he meandered his way to hell. But now, I’ve watched people drown and I’ve broken a good man’s heart. I’ve killed someone. It’s no pleasure anymore to waste the few words I have left.

What you really want to know is how a good girl like me could fall for a killer. You’re looking for specific beats in our origin story: he bewitched everyone with his charm, but in hindsight you could see the dark spots. I get this question most often from those with a strong belief that all people have souls, and by ‘souls’ I mean unchangeable cores of either good or evil. I get it. It’d be nice to think that Saul was born black-hearted.

But he wasn’t.

Author: Nikki Roberti

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25 Comments

  1. This seems fantastic. I’d be delighted to read. Please send the full manuscript as a Microsoft word document to brent[at]triadaus[dot][com] with “Pitch Wars request” in the subject line and your query letter in the body of the message. Looking forward to reading!

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  2. Hi Tracie,
    This is a very gripping opening—I’d love to read more of this! Please send a query, synopsis, and full manuscript (Word documents will suffice) to ssulaiman@talcottnotch.net — and don’t forget to mention #PitchWars in your subject line. Thanks—looking forward to my read!
    Good luck,
    –Saba

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  3. I’d love to take a look at the full manuscript. Please send it as a word attachment to querycaitie (at) lizadawson (dot) com with your query in the email, with the PitchWars request in the subject.

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  4. Would love to see the full! Can you please send the full ms, along with the query + 10 pages pasted in the body of the email, with subject line: PITCH WARS + Title.

    Thank you! 🙂

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  5. I love the voice here! I would love to see the full manuscript in Word format with the pitch pasted onto the first page. Please send materials to HannahQuery@KTLiterary.com with PITCH WARS in the subject line.

    Thanks so much! I’m looking forward to it!

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  6. Hi Tracie,
    May I request the complete manuscript as a Word attachment sent to me at submissions at stonesong dot com?
    Emmanuelle

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  7. I would love to see more of this! Please send a query (in the body of the email) plus the first 50 pages as a Word doc attachment to patricia@marsallyonliteraryagency.com, and make sure to put “Pitch Wars Request” and the title in the subject line.

    Looking forward to reading!

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  8. Love this! Please send a full + the query to strothmanagency (at ) gmail (.) com as an attached word document (.doc) with REQUESTED PITCH WARS in the subject line.

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  9. I’d like to see more! Please send 50 pages to submissions@janklow.com with query, and please include “Pitch Wars – Stefanie Lieberman” in the subject line.

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  10. Cults are creepy–along with more sinister goings-on!–I’m really intrigued! Could I see the full ms as a PDF, please, sent to lana@chalbergsussman.com, along with the query and “Pitch Wars” in the subject line?

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  11. I’d love to read as well! Please feel free to send a query and the full manuscript (as a word doc) to taylorsubmit@waxmanleavell.com w/PitchWars in the subject line.

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  12. This sounds phenomenal, and I’m taken by the voice! I’d love to see the full manuscript. Please send it + query + synopsis to LBiagi (at) jvnla (dot) com, with Pitch Wars in the subject line. Excited to read!

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  13. Agreeing with everyone else here – would love to see this! Please send me the full query (pasted in the email) and attach the 1st 3 chapters. Send to sarah@bradfordlit.com with the subject line “Pitch Wars: Then Beggars Would Ride.” Thank you!

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  14. Hi Tracie,

    I am all about this. Can you please send the complete manuscript – as either a Word Doc or PDF – to victoria.queries@irenegoodman,com with “pitchwars” somewhere in the subject line!

    Thank you so much!

    Victoria

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  15. This sounds so unique! I’d love to keep reading. Please send the full manuscript as a Word doc or PDF with the query in the body of the email to melissa@rpcontent.com, and be sure to put “Pitch Wars” in the subject line.

    Thanks!

    Melissa Nasson
    Rubin Pfeffer Content

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  16. Completely captured by your voice! Please send the full manuscript as a word attachment to stacey@donaghyliterary.com with your query in the body of the email. Use email subject #PitchWars- TITLE-YA Literary Thriller. Looking forward to reading your story.

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  17. Hi Tracie–Intriguing premise, and great opening page. Please send the manuscript and a synopsis as Word doc attachments to queryroseanne@gmail.com with Pitch Wars and Query + title in the subject line. Can’t wait to read!

    Roseanne Wells
    The Jennifer De Chiara Literary Agency

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  18. Hi Tracie! I’m absolutely loving this. Can you please send the full and your query to penelope.gsliterary@gmail.com with “Pitch Wars” in the subject line? Thanks so much!
    Penelope

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  19. This sounds awesome! Please send the query, first fifty pages, and a synopsis to kirsten[at]prospectagency[dot]com. Looking forward to reading more!

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