Query & 1st Page Workshop with Chimera Editing Services … Day 7
Jan23

Query & 1st Page Workshop with Chimera Editing Services … Day 7

15 critiques for ’15! My wonderful critique partners have started a new freelance editing business and agreed to sponsor my January workshop. Jami Nord and K.T. Hanna have helped me spruce up my manuscripts and now they’re helping fifteen lucky and brave writers with theirs. The winners have already been picked. This is the last day of the workshop, go back and read Jami’s and Katie’s critiques from the previous days and learn from their advice. Today’s final three were a joint effort by  Jami and K.T.  We aren’t mentioning names or titles. It’s up to the writers if they want to reveal themselves. If you’re interested in hiring Chimera Editing Services, go visit the website to learn more about their reasonably priced services … Chimera Editing Services   Critiques by …     K.T. Hanna        &                  Jami Nord    1st Critique…  Query: Dear (Agent), (Personalization goes here) Space, the final chance for true romance: To Captain Mark(,) life should be an adventure. Opposing the tyrannical Company is not so much a political statement as something fun to do. Sitting around in a more settled life feels like death, so when he wakes from cryogenic sleep the first thing he wants (after a cup of coffee) is to get back to the action. He and his ragtag crew of rebels had gone into hiding because they were low on supplies so the first order of business is to restock somehow. They only have enough energy left in the fuel cell for this one last blastoff, and the solar panels are damaged, so this means tThe next time they land may be their last. The thought of eeking out a living while stuck on some terrestrial rock terrifies Mark, as does getting caught by the Company and being sentenced to an accountant’s life in the pod-farm; so wWhen his ship comes upon an interspace cruiser, though they have never stooped so low before, he decides to go pirate on it. (Watch long run on sentences too close together like that. It feels rambly, though I like the touches of voice this has as well.) Pilot Brit loves the adventurous life too. She can scrap it up with the best of them, and she flies Captain Mark’s ship skillfully by the seat of her pants, a major source of pride for her. However, when they become stranded on a life-sustaining planet(,) she discovers her desire to play house with Mark and wants to explore these feelings further. Unfortunately(,) her violent past makes her body unwilling to allow close encounters of the male...

Read More